Monday, 25th May, 2015
Again, it’s been a while. I guess, since most of my posts tend to be when something unfavourable has occurred, I’d say life’s been good enough that I’ve had nothing to write about really. I’ll analyse why I only write when I’m upset on a later date, other than the most obvious reason; it’s therapeutic.
I picked Gemini as a theme of discussion because, well it’s Gemini season! And I’m a Gemini. There’s a Gemini fact that I’ve always been told is very prominent but always dismissed. Until now obviously.
That trait would be that a Gemini is one of the loneliest people on earth. They feel that no one truly understands them and that no one will ever really want to. Maybe that’s why Gemini’s are considered shallow. It’s a defense mechanism. Nothing hurts more than opening up to a person completely to have it thrown back in your face when they dismiss your thoughts, troubles and dreams because they simply didn’t understand it.
I talked to someone today. We were having a bit of a tiff and whatever I’d been feeling compounded into a massive blow out where I broke down and just told them everything I was feeling because of their actions. They turned everything around on me saying I was the wrong party and that they knew they were wrong but I was overreacting. Seriously the worst thing you could say to anyone, not just a Gemini.
And I guess it made me think about what else is actually true on those newspaper horoscope things I tend to read for fun. I thought a lot about myself and how it’s true that I don’t open up to most people, that I’m always smiling despite how I really feel and only if I really trust you will I show you the inner layers. So to have that thrown in my face, again, today was a big blow.
It’s not even just a Gemini thing. It’s just how my thought process started. This applies to everyone everywhere. Everyone’s got their own defense mechanisms and ways of coping. Everyone hides their truest self until they’re alone. I read somewhere that there are three faces to every human being; the public face, the friends and family face, and the face when the person is completely and totally alone. It makes me sad to think that the world has come to such a state where we need to have those many faces. It’s sadder still that there is truth in the statement where we have a face reserved for family and friends. Ideally, you’d like to be yourself completely around the people you love, and the fact that you’re not, no matter how much you try, highlights so strongly the deepest insecurities a person has.
It brought to light another fact; everyone knows we hide ourselves and yet no one tried to help you find you. I reckon that’s worse than having to hide yourself. At least it is for me.
I’m sitting here shaking my head at all the thoughts and emotions running around in circles in my brain and I can’t fully express just how disheartened it’s made me feel. And if I’m feeling it I know people out there are too.
So all I have to say to end this quite haphazard post is that, if you want someone to discover the truest version of yourself, work to try discover their’s. It doesn’t matter who it is. Could be a complete stranger even. Make someone feel like they matter, like they belong and that you care, someone cares. Then maybe, just maybe, by doing that, there will be hope for the world after all.
The song I’ve chosen for this post is so fitting it couldn’t NOT be the song.
Take care of yourselves and stay safe guys 🙂